Characters & Locations

Part 4

Italy

( Breaking Though The Simulation )

2007 - 2009

After wandering the Earth most of his adult life, never staying in one place for more than a couple years, the 24th floor of the Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini) in Italy was to become Loid's 'permanent' home...

Rimini, Italy by Loid Larson

View of Rimini, Italy from the balcony of Loid and his boyfriend's new home.
( To the right side is the 2000 year old
Roman Tiberius Bridge )

Rimini, Italy
2007

Loid had been living with his italian boyfriend though most of the 2000s in Italy by overstaying his tourist visa a month or two each year without incident. It did however began to complicate and intensify his lifelong struggle with paranoia. Since highschool his oldest friend would always call him, "Paranoid Loid".

Home renovation in progress on the 24th floor of the Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini)

Rimini, Italy
2007

Another Brick Off The Wall

Rimini, Italy
2007

Rehearsing something. Always something

Rimini, Italy
2007

Raised platform complete

Rimini, Italy
2007
Loid Larson & Giovanni Casadei at Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini)

On the Balcony above Rimini

Rimini, Italy
2007

In 2007, after already overstaying his tourist visa by almost a year, Loid and his Italian boyfriend bought a condominium on the 24th floor of the Grattacielo di Rimini, Italy (The Skyscraper of Rimini). This place in the sky had southern facing windows overlooking the beach and Adriatic Sea. The large balcony faced west overlooking the Roman and Medieval town of Rimini, Italy. Rimini is one of a few cities along a couple miles of coastline known for summer beach vacations and famous restaurants and nightclubs.

24th Floor above Rimini, Italy was the home of Giovanni Casadei & Loid Larson

Home Restoration Complete. Even then it seemed like a dream. Now it seems completely unreal.

Rimini, Italy
2007

Loid's desk in his studio on the 24th floor of the Skyscraper of Rimini. Gustav Klimt inspired acrylic on wood board.

Rimini, Italy
2007

Picnic above Rimini

Rimini, Italy
2007

The LIVING ROOM

Rimini, Italy
2007
Giovanni Casadei and Loid Larson

In the Skyscraper elevator

Rimini, Italy
2007

TAO was the best cat in the whole world

Rimini, Italy
2008
Night view from the balcony on the 24th floor of the Skyscraper of Rimini with 2000 year old Roman Tibris Bridge by Loid Larson

Night view from the balcony on the 24th floor of the Skyscraper of Rimini with 2000 year old Roman Tiberius Bridge

Rimini, Italy
2008

There was always hope that gay marriage would someday solve both their immigration problems. Until then Loid had painted himself into a corner and there seemed no way out that did not leave a mess. To go though airport customs in Italy, where his passport would show the length he had overstayed his visa, could well end in deportation without the possibility to ever reentering Italy again. Or to stay in Italy illegally would mean living under constant threat of also being deported. In Italy when police pull your car over for a routine check everyone inside the car must get out and present their Identifications to ether the regular police or the militarily police. Every time Loid left his home in Italy and ventured outside he suffered from the constant paranoid fear of being deported and loosing everything.

An Italian Psychologist

Loid's Italian Psychologist

Rimini, Italy
2008
An Italian Psychologist Above Rimini

Another Italian Psychologist Above Rimini

Rimini, Italy
2008
In your 30s all your friends start to have babies

In your 30s all your friends start to have babies

Riccione, Italy
2008

Gio and another friend's baby

Riccione, Italy
2008
Rimini, Italy TANGO

Tango Party

Rimini, Italy
2008
Chris Jacobson, Chris Jay, Christopher David Jacobson

Loid's Guardian Angel

Rimini, Italy
2008
Cocoricò Nightclub in Riccione, Italy.  LaRie & Gio Dancing to the DJ set up in the woman's restroom at Cocoricò Nightclub, Riccione

Dancing to the DJ set in the woman's restroom

Cocoricò NightclubRiccione, Italy
2006

Loid's melancholy friend choosing an outfit for The Costume Party

Rimini, Italy
2008

Making a choice for The Costume Party

Rimini, Italy
2008
Rimini, Italy The Skyscraper of Rimini and Loid Larson (Grattacielo di Rimini)

The Skyscraper of Rimini and Loid (Grattacielo di Rimini)

Rimini, Italy
2008

Loid had overstayed his tourist visa for the last 4 years in Italy. Living as an alien in a foreign country, under constant threat of deportation, distorted Loid's reality. The paranoia he had experienced his whole life was now amplified and made real. The very real threat of loosing everything and never being able to return to Italy caused panic attacks and psychosis. All because gay marriage was not yet recognized by ether country.

Coast of the Adriatic Sea seen from Loid's studio on the 24th floor of the Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini) at night looking south with train station below.

Coast of the Adriatic Sea seen from Loid's studio on the 24th floor of the Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini) at night looking south with train station below.

Rimini, Italy
2007

Before the New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008

Guest Dancing at New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008

Guests Dancing at the New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008
Rimini, Italy New Years Eve Party 2007/2008

Waiting for Fireworks at the window of Loid's studio. New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008
Rimini, Italy

New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008

2 Italian Psychologists Skyping at Loid's desk at the New Years Eve Party

Rimini, Italy
2007/2008

For a month in Spring 2008, in various apartments throughout the Grattacielo di Rimini (Skyscraper of Rimini), peoples homes were transformed into stages for the SOLD OUT theatrical extravaganza CAMPANELLI "Door Bells".

The PLAYERS setting the stage in our living room

Rimini, Italy
2008
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Azzurro Polvere (Blue Dust). Preformed in front of an audience in our living room twice a night.

Photo credit Chico de LuigiRimini, Italy
2008

Azzurro Polvere (Blue Dust)
Preformed in front of an audience in our living room twice a night

Rimini, Italy
2008



A Void of Loids

Skyscraper of Rimini, Italy
2008

In 2008 Loid began having a series of severe Panic Attacks. The stress of the attacks began to form cracks in his relationship to everyone around him.

Tao, Giovanni Casadei and Loid Larson 2008 Grattacielo di Rimini

"L'amore Cava Dalla Carne le Bestie e le lascia libere sotto un temporalele"
( Love Carves the Flesh of the Beasts and Leaves Them Free Under a Thunderstorm )

Photo credit Chico de Luigi

Rimini, Italy
2008

Skyscraper of Rimini at night as seen from the 2000 year old Tiberius Bridge ( Grattacielo di Rimini )

Rimini, Italy
2008

Loid Experiencing Zen Psychosis As THE TOWER Begins To Collapse

Rimini, Italy
2009
The Tower Tarot card

THE TOWER (Tarot Card) .--Misery, distress, indigence, adversity, calamity, disgrace, deception, ruin,. It is a card in particular of unforeseen catastrophe. Reversed: Negligence, absence, distribution, carelessness, apathy, nullity, vanity

Psychosis is an abnormal condition of the mind that results in difficulties determining what is real and what is not.

Loid's studio on the 24th floor of The Skyscraper of Rimini ( Grattacielo di Rimini )

Rimini, Italy
2009


It was during this period of Psychedelic Psychosis that Loid had a vision of the future.

That vision became the video art project:

The Technological Singularity by Loid Larson
The Technological Singularity by Loid Larson
The Technological Singularity



Loid and The Technological Singularity in his studio on the 24th floor of THE TOWER / Skyscraper of Rimini ( Grattacielo di Rimini )

Rimini, Italy
2009

Loid's cat TAO Yawning and Yawning and Yawning

Rimini, Italy
2009
Chris Jacobson, Chris Jay, Christopher David Jacobson

Loid's oldest friend experiencing The Technological Singularity

Rimini, Italy
2009

In Loid's studio with his Best Friend from Argentina and his cat TAO X 3

Rimini, Italy
2009

6 months after Loid's experience in Amsterdam his Italian boyfriend had a heart attack in front of him and appeared to have died while they were renting an apartment for 6 months in Greenwich Village, New York. Since then Loid had begun to exhibit symptoms of psychosis and an increase in the paranoia he had dealt with his whole life. These symptoms greatly increased during the last years in Italy living as an illegal alien on the 24th floor of a Tower on the opposite side of the planet from where he was born.

 Il fuoco di San Giuseppe  ( Saint Joseph's  Bonfire) on the beach of Rimini below THE TOWER

Il fuoco di San Giuseppe ( Saint Joseph's Bonfire) on the beach of Rimini below THE TOWER

Rimini, Italy
2009

Loid's psychologist friend recommended a therapist to help overcome the fear of being deported, getting on a plane, returning to the USA, leaving Italy, and leaving his only home. All sessions of therapy were done with the idea that taking the chance of leaving and reentering Italy legally would give Loid more options to stay permanently and become a resident of a country that had felt like home for so many years.

On The 24th Floor of THE TOWER Walking Away From It All

Rimini, Italy
2009

Video of Loid and his best friend's last Sunday together in Italy

Emilia-Romagna, Italy
2009
Rimini, Italy and The Technological Singularity with Paulo Derrico & Loid Larson Roman Tiberius Bridge and the Skyscraper of Rimini ( Grattacielo di Rimini )

Loid and his best friend from Argentina saying goodbye in front of the 2000 year old Roman Tiberius Bridge and the Skyscraper of Rimini ( Grattacielo di Rimini ). 24 floors above Rimini, Italy they would talk endlessly about Space and Time and about the approaching Technological Singularity,

Rimini, Italy
2009
Rimini, Italy, loid larson  Skyscraper of Rimini ( Grattacielo di Rimini )

Last view from Loid's studio window before leaving Italy forever

Rimini, ItalySeptember 2009

Some Things Are Not Meant to Be


Click here to read Loid's departing letter to his Italian boyfriend
✏️


In the beginning with You life seemed to be so simple.


When you were sad, I made you happy.

When I was weak, You made me strong.

When you were bored, I gave you music and told you about the stars.

When I felt alone, You brought the world to me.

When you needed to travel, I created a job that’s too easy to be real.

When I was lost in myself, You took me for walks on the beach.

When you needed to smile, I made beautiful sunsets.

When I was hungry, You created eatable art.


We tried to learn each other’s language, but in the end invented our own.

Our own unique intimacy. We were two little boys and everything was new.

We were opposites… like a cat and a dog.

It’s amazing we’ve been together so long.


Now it’s all fucked up. Because that simple version of me died in Amsterdam.

Somehow I came back to life and I returned to you.

But it’s not me anymore. I have become a exaggerated memory of all that I was.


When you died in New York I wished you back to life to have another chance.

I needed to find a way to tell you not to be afraid…

so we could find ourselves again.


But when you came back to life you were no longer you.

Everything became exaggerated and I no longer knew who you were.

I had remembered you wrong? I remembered everything wrong?


When I went crazy and lost faith in the world you made me a safe home.

A tower in the sky on the other side of the earth from where I was born.

To escape any further I would need to go to the moon.


And I’ve tried to go further, but it’s never far enough. It’s still always me.


There IS something terribly wrong with me. It is not you or the world.

I have escaped inside my head to avoid telling you the truth.


In the Tower we wait. And we watch each other. And wonder who will jump first?


Did I make you crazy or did you make me crazy?

Or are we just crazy like everyone else?


When I broke all the rules of society, You struggled to keep me in your world.

You did everything possible for me but I resisted.

I resisted because the more I saw of your world the less I understood it.


I am so afraid of what I have become. I’m so afraid to finish this story.

For one year I’ve been paralyzed. Unable to move or speak to you.

When I try to speak to you only the wrong words come out.


I knew this made you sad so I created the perfect animal to give us a family.

I thought this would bring us closer together.

But instead has become another excuse to not look you in the eyes.

Because when I look at you I am ashamed. And I’m afraid.

I’m ashamed of all you have done for me. I’m ashamed for all I’ve failed to do.

I’m ashamed because my fear is destroying our dreams.


I have created a trap for myself here.

I know there is no way out without making a mess.


The truth is… life with me has never been simple. And never will.

The truth is… I am broken. I don’t believe there will ever be enough time to fix me.

The truth is… I love you. But all my love can not erase how much I’ve hurt you.


For me, my life with you has been better than any novel or film or play.

I thought I could create art to show you my perspective of the world.

But you are correct… I’m not an artist.

I know I have to leave you.

It will be the hardest thing I’ll ever do.

I know I’ve already delayed this for too long.

I have to leave you to prove that I love you.


You are the Light of my world and I have become the Darkness of yours.


The Technological Singularity, Credi Nel Computer, Believe in the Computer, Italian Graffiti

"Believe in the Computer"

Italian Graffiti2006


CHRONOLOGY